Then give a response to at least one of your colleagues. Identify which post you're responding to by screen name and date and time posted. A good response will be at least one substantial paragraph long, and will show evidence of serious engagement with the issue raised by your colleague.
Please give your own response to these questions by 2 a.m. on Sunday morning; then read your colleagues' thoughts and respond to them by 2 a.m. on Tuesday morning. Have fun! I hope it'll be an interesting discussion.
Remember to treat everyone with dignity and respect.
- The movie argues that romantic love could withstand quite profound changes in personal qualities - what do you think about that?
- What do you think about the relationship between love and sex implied by the movie?
- What else did you find particularly interesting about the concept of love raised by the movie?
The movie argues that romantic love could withstand quite profound change in personal qualities such as a partner having a sex change. I would have to agree with the movie that profound love can with stand anything as long as both partners love one other and know that they are soul mates. The couple would have to be with able to withstand one another through thick or thin and be able to support one another no matter what. In order to do so you must be able to listen to one another and be aware of how you making the other partner feel and what they might be going through.
ReplyDeleteIf i truely loved the person and that person loved me back and treated me with respect all the time and never layed a had on me or did anything to jeopardize the marriage and he came to me with a similar situation, yes at first i would be mad but i would come to terms to with it, I think i would come to terms with it because that person supported me no matter what i did even if it was a mistake and it is now my turn to do the same. I know that would be criticism from others but at least i would have my husband at the end of the day to keep me going. As you say to one another would you are getting married "for better or for worse, for richer or for poor, for sickness or for health: no matter what you will be there for your partner.
" Love endures all things. Love never fails."1 Corinthians 13: 7,8. This is a thought that could be applied to this movie because the wife endured not only her husband decididing he was actually a woman, but enduring all that came with it. I do believe that a marriage that is founded on a true friendship and real love could withstand almost anything that it is faced with, because even if the marriage may begin to fail, the friendship that is is founded on can withstand much.
ReplyDeleteBut eventhough she was able to forgive him and let him back into her life, that is not something that I could do. I may love you with all of my heart, but to me you are betraying me and taking away my place in the marriage. I wed you to be the wife and you the husband, and that is how I would want it to stay. I believe that our love could endure much, but to me that would be asking for too much.
Bethany
JaLesia L.
ReplyDelete-The movie argues that romantic love could withstand quite profound changes in personal qualities as long as each partner can agree with the changes that has to be delt with. When you get married you take vows such as you will be with your spouse through rich or for poor & through hard times and bad times which means you have to stick it out until the end.& also True Love cannot be broken no matter what because its a strong bond that is supposed to be mutual.
-The relationship between love and sex that was implied by the movie was that just to love someone you dont necessarly have to have sex. Love is stronger than anything and sex doesn't make love come alive.
-In the movie what was interesting to me was how she let him sleep in the same bed with her again. but it was good that she had forgave him because forgivness is the key. in a way it's like if you dont love yourself you can't love and without forgivness you cant forgive yourself or others.
Response to question #2:
ReplyDeleteI feel that sex was trivial in comparison to love in the movie. This notion is proven in the end by Irma deciding to stay with “Ruth”. The fact that her love for him (or her) was the deciding factor in her staying makes it apparent that she was able to overlook her sexual needs. She was willing to take the next step into her life with Roy/Ruth with the uncertainty of there ever being any sexual gratification in store for the both of them.
On another note, Roy/Ruth also wants to stay with Irma despite the sexual feelings he doesn’t have towards her. Although he wants to become a woman and doesn’t really have an attraction to women, he decides to maintain the same relationship with Irma because of his genuine love for her. The deep and almost unconditional love these two have for each other keeps their marriage going despite the ambiguity of their future sex life.
To be honest I came in on the last part of the movie I was absent on Tuesday, but on Thursday I did catch were there was a decision with accepting of a spouse having a sex change. the movie argues that love could withstand quite profound changes in personal qualities. From observation I believe that romantic love could withstand any changes in personal qualities. I believe that when you commit yourself to a person with vows you should be able to stand and stick by that person regardless of a persons qualities.Being married you say those vows until death do us part, for better or for worse those vows are deep they are very serious, that is a commitment you have to stick it out. when married you give up the I's. its no longer I its us. The relationship between love and sex was kind of difficult for me to understand do to the fact me missing so much, I do believe that the relationship between them was, when you love you are excepting that person for who they are, regardless of the change they love each other. They loved each other so much that sex was not even there priority I believe you can love anybody without having sex. The other thing that was interesting was how hard that women fought for her husband even through his changes. Even though her church family tried to convince her to leave him, she gave up the I's for her man that was the most interesting part, I was expecting her to leave him. I just though that she was for sure going to leave him.
ReplyDeleteAfter watching this movie one thing was clear, when love is real it overpasses everything. By the end of the film it was quite obvious that romantic love withstands any change. Love itself is a wonderful feeling and if it is real and unconditional it can overcome any obstacle. I totally agree with what the movie is portraying. Love and sex go together but sex isnt the most important thing. When he decided to get the surgery she felt as if she wasnt good enough and it even seemed as if she wouldnt forgive him. After time went by and she made her choices on the side she realized she was in love with him regardless of what he was like or what he wanted so romantic or unconditional love as i will call it overcomes everything if it is real.
ReplyDeleteThe relationship between love and sex in the movie was sort of easy to see. Sex as in gender should be able to express freely when ever possible. Being a man or a woman transexual gay bi or whatever you are shouldnt limit anyone to a life they dont feel comfortable with. If the people around you love you and love you unconditionally, they will understand all changes and respect al decisions in life. It may not be easy at first but just as we saw the mans wife come around, everyone eventually does. Physical sex is a feeling like many others. Its good while it lasts but love is forever and unconditional.
After watching the movie I thought that the way in which something so common was portrayed, was really interesting. We are ignorant to the fact that not everyone out there thinks the way we do. Something weird and crazy to us may be someone else's happiness and we are no one to judge them. We have the nerve to tell people to let us live our lives the way we want and when others try to do the same we act as if they arent allowed to do so. An open mind is needed to learn to tolerate things that we may not find good or correct. If his happiness and well being involved a sex change, so be it no one had the right to judge him. Everyone does what makes them happy. This movie was done in an effort to teach people of what is going on out there. Tolerance is key to better living atleast that is what i got out of it...
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ReplyDeleteIn the movie, Irma loved Roy/Ruth no matter what. She loved his soul & kindness & gave up a sexual relationship with him. Irma was indeed the key factor to the concept of love raised in this movie.
ReplyDeleteIn the movie, Irma realized that Roy/Ruth's father did not accept the possibility of him acting/dressing like a girl. Roy/Ruth's mother always knew in her heart, but it was never openly discussed in the family. Even though everyone pretended not to notice, he showed inclinations since childhood. Irma found it much easier to understand/cope with the situation regardless of how hard it was for her, because she realized how painful it had being for Roy/Ruth to hide it all those years, just to fit in family/society. Irma was a woman that was able to keep her family together & her love for Roy/Ruth was above all things!!
from Amalia:
ReplyDeleteAmalia D.
*Could love really withstand quite profound changes. I guess it all depends on the type of relationship you have with your partner. The true person doesn't come out until something drastic happens in the relationship. Times are different now and some people may choose to leave the relationship becasue its an easy way out.
*Love is a very powerful word and it has different meanings. In the case of the movie she really loved her husband because as a married women i don't know what i would have done. Of course i would have been mad but would i be willing to deal with the fact that i would never have my husband back. In a relationship sex is not everything,its part of it. It just a way for the couple to connect physically.
*What i found interesting about the movie was how she but her pride aside and helped him deal with his situation.I was amazed on how she went about the situtation, leaving her religion an putting her life on hold to help her husband. Thats what love is really about.
Response to Wendy Casasola March 8, 2010 12:39 am: I agree that Irma was the key factor to the concept of love in the movie. Her golden heart and benevolence made it easier for her to block the cons of Roy/Ruths operation, proving that her love for him/her was pure. In the end she was understanding and empathetic to all that Roy/Ruth had been going through, and was able to keep the marriage afloat.
ReplyDeleteResponse to Amalia: after reading your post i cant help but agree with you... You dont fully know a person until you have had an issue or have lived with them... People say they love someone who they date but in reality to really love someone, you need to know them very well. Love i agree is a very powerful word and Irma really loved Roy. I would have loved him too if i were the one in a relationship for 25 years but her love proved to be much more than romantic love. Her love was unselfish and pure. After watching the movie i agree with what was said... Her love was real, it was demonstrated when she let go of everything and continued her relationship with Roy
ReplyDelete@ Wendy
ReplyDeleteI have to agree with you when you stated "Roy/Ruth's mother always knew in her heart, but it was never openly discussed in the family. Even though everyone pretended not to notice, he showed inclinations since childhood." The reason I agree with you is because family has to stick by you no matter what even if you are in between life and you are struggling with life crisis's.
@Shahin: I agree with what you're saying. After 25 years of marriage, their love was more than physical. They were in love with each other and willing to stand together through all of this. What i do wonder,after seeing this movie,weather it was 100% because of love, or a small fraction of fear of change.
ReplyDeleteI found it interesting how the church treated "Ruth" after she came out of the closet. I understand the rules of religion, but she was still technically the same person that he was, in the aspect of a follower. They promised support, but displayed disgust. "Those who don't sin cast the first stone."
ReplyDeletein the movie Irma has to face and overcome a huge problem in her relationship.i thought it was weird how roy wanted to become a woman. personally i think that if my girlfriend wanted to become a man i wouldn't like because i want to be the only man in our relationship, but if my girlfriend would like to bring another girl into our relationship i would be fine with it. i think that when you really love someone and if you have being with someone for as long as roy and irma have people can overcome the toughest challenges that life puts in front of us.
ReplyDeleteCalvin Choy in Human 160:
ReplyDeleteActually, the main message from the movie is "Love someone whatever his/her the gender is", because it is very difficult if you got "something" that is very embrassed to say, don't be afraid!
The movie argues that love could withstand quite profound changes in personal qualities. I agree with this, but i would also have to say that i believe it depends on the couple. Any strong couple who has been through it all together would have a better chance at lasting through anything or mostly anything. Especially if it has to deal with their partner changing in many ways. Relationships change one another and when your in a relationship with someone, your most likely to change and grow with them. However some people end up growing apart from their partner as they change.
ReplyDeleteIn the movie, Roy and Erma have been together for twenty-five years, and that is a very long time. The changes Roy made were very intense, and put a real test to their relationship. It took Erma a lot of getting use to, and it put a lot of stress on their relationship. But she loved him, and supported him after a while. Like at the end of the movie where Erma is seen giving Roy a pearl necklace, when it's usually the other way around. That scene showed that their love was strong because they were still together dealing with it, and she showed she cared by treating Roy like a wife and giving him a pretty necklace, instead of staying embarassed.-Lindsay S.
This movie made me realize that you can truly love a person without being intimate with that person. With time people change. This is natural. Some of the challenges of being in a long term relationship are learning how to compromise, humble yourself and accept change.You must fall in love with someone who's imperfections you like.
ReplyDeleteI do not believe you can really love someone if you cant trust that person. Ruth trusted Irma enough to finally reveal his self. Sometimes unselfish love can be humiliating. Irma was humiliated by her husbands revelation at first. But when she seen that Ruth was in turmoil and ready to kill himself Irma quickly put her own feelings to the side and asked him to come back home. Love can make you do things you never thought you would do;sometimes even go against everything you believe in. I know Roy's desire to be Ruth was against Irma's religious beliefs and probably everything she stood for. But her love for him was stronger than anything. She expressed inner beauty and outter strength.
@Lindsay
ReplyDeleteI agree with your comments. Its true that people change in relationships and its unfortunate that sometimes people grow apart. The ability to communicate comfortably, without the fear of judgment can help out a lot; along with a keen ear.
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ReplyDeleteI do agree with what the movie portrays that romantic love could withstand profound changes. I also believe that it comes down to how strong and mature the couple is. In order for a relationship to withstand such changes I believe a strong foundation of communication, understanding, and trust must already be established. A relationship is like a building. A foundation needs to be set before any building can be constructed. The height of a building depends on its foundation; the same can be said about relationships. If it so happens that the relationship does falls apart, the strong foundation offers an option to rebuild. Any relationship without a strong foundation would crumble under such profound changes.
ReplyDeleteIn the case of Roy and Irma I believe their love was real. Their relationship was challenged by such change that hurt their relationship, causing Irma and Roy to rebuild their relationship. Irma found it difficult to accept the change Roy wanted. With lots of understanding from Irma, and communication between them both, helped Irma to eventually accept the change and rebuild their relationship.
If there is one thing that I took from this movie it is that when true love is real, love can overcome anything. When you love someone, you love that entire person. You love the good and the bad about that person. Not saying the change was a bad thing but that is what Irma did. She loved all of him, inside and out, unconditionally.
i belive the romantic love can be strecthed to a certain extent. the love of the couples can determine the durability of the romantic love.in the case of irma and roy irma put up with alot after understanding roys feelings and took it into her cosideration to help him as a friend in heart more than as a spose.
ReplyDeletethe relationship implied by roy an irma was one in which irma was allowed by roy to have a sexual affair after 25 years of marraige this shows that roy is trying whole heartedly to please his wife while completing his operation
by: paul a
1. The movie argues that romantic love could withstand quite profound changes in personal qualities such as sex change. In the movie a woman accepts her husbands sex change because of her love for him. She believed that he was her soul mate and nothing could change that. I believe that what she showed was a true romantic love. Even through pain and suffering she stayed by her husband and loved him through his sex change.
ReplyDelete2. Even though I believe that humans are sexual beings I believe that love can overcome anything. In the movie the wife gives up her sexual life so that her husband can feel whole. Sex does not have the same power as love. True love conquers all.
3. I liked how the movie showed love in an unconventional way. The movie shows us that people don’t show true love until they can take their relationship past any type of trouble or pain. The movie shows us that love is hard but worth it.
Joseph Torres
@Jade N.
ReplyDeleteI agree trust is a huge part in a realationship.
@ Bethany
ReplyDeletewhen you said " Love endures all things. Love never fails." I have to agree with that because i look at my parents and they have been through a lot together and during those times they got mad at one another but remembered that they loved one another no matter what. As i saw the movie it was the same they were disguised with one another but eventually got over and remembered that they on one another
@ Virgilio
ReplyDeleteI do agree with you when you stated that In order for a relationship to withstand changes:
1. "A strong foundation must be established".
2. "A relationship is like a building. A foundation needs to be set before any building can be constructed".
3. "Any relationship without a strong foundation would crumble under profound changes".
In this movie there was an evident strong foundation, regardless how strong it crumbled, it maneged to hold together strongly.
Wendy C.